Today I had my eighth Rolfing session. Rolfing is so different from any other bodywork I’ve had and blends “massage” with structural alignment in a way that is fascinating and sensible.
Lisa, the Rolfer, is so adept at seeing patterns of movement in the body that may be creating chronic holding, weakness or pain. The process of Rolfing involves the way you stand, walk and move in the world—those unconscious patterns that can come from childhood, trauma or injury.
The body is extraordinary. I think my awe of it is one of the reasons I love asana so much. Still, I know nothing exists only on the physical plane. Emotions and memories, especially when unacknowledged, take up residence in the body often in less-than-ideal ways. The mind affects the body, the body can affect the mind.
After years of yoga practice, I consider myself fairly body-aware, even of my bad habits. There’s an irony to thinking about the things I don’t know of—thinking that I might become aware of those patterns that are, by definition, “unconscious.”
One of those patterns is where my head rests over my spine and shoulders, which is usually forward of its ideal placement. Lisa worked for a whole session on my neck and head, stretching and massaging, seeking to create balance.
After and hour and a half I stood up and felt my head float toward the ceiling. I think I was actually taller! Lisa asked me to walk and move to help integrate the shifts she had offered. My body felt amazing.
We chatted and finally finished up the appointment and I stood up to say goodbye. Ready to go out into the world again I went back to being the “me” that is comfortable, if not a little unaware. Lisa reached toward me, held my head like a helmut and said, “Put your head back on!”
The emotional patterns of adolescence—embarrassed to be tall, wanting to blend into the background, lacking self-confidence—have translated into a physical pattern of rounding forward to cover and protect the heart and letting the head hang apologetically. The emotional momentum of this pattern has (mostly) diminished, yet the physical expression remains.
My “homework” is to rise to the occasion, open my eyes to the moment, know where my head is! This means staying engaged and connected with the world around me rather than collapsing around my inner experience.
Sounds like yoga to me…
